My number one tip for keeping things simple and saving money is to stay home more. Staying home is one of the simplest ways to have more time, spend less money, accumulate less clutter, and well, to plain just live a less frantic lifestyle.
A lot of times I'm asked how I get so much done. Let me tell you, I'm no wonder woman, but I do know that one of my "secrets" to efficiency is that I am home almost all day, every day.
I've purposely said "no" to a multitude of outside activities and opportunities because I know that running around with two little children for most of the day not only wears me out, it is a surefire way for me to spend more money (i.e. trips through the fast-food lane while we're out, swinging by to check out a sale I see signs for when I don't really need anything, or ordering carry out for dinner because I'm exhausted and didn't have time to make anything for dinner) and get less done. It's just not worth it, folks.
Now, am I saying you need to cut out every outside activity and commitment and never step foot outside your doorstep? No. What I am encouraging you to do is to carefully evaluate all outside commitments and see if there are some that are really necessities or if they are just cluttering up your life for no good reason.
My current redwork project. Embroidering while listening to some good messages or peaceful music is so relaxing and invigorating to me. And staying home more allows me to carve out time for this on a regular basis!In the area of grocery shopping, one thing which has helped me tremendously is to limit myself to one grocery shopping trip a week. Outside of my once-a-week grocery shopping trip, unless there is some incredibly knock-down-drag-out good deal on something we need and use and we're going to be right in the vicinity of that store or it is right down the block from us, I just pass the deal over.
Knowing that I've only got one shot at grocery shopping each week motivates me to do the best I can do in that one shopping trip. It also forces me to make sure and write a thorough menu and grocery list and to have determined the sales and matched them with my coupons ahead of time. If I forget to write an ingredient down, I have to do without.
You want to know a secret? While post a lot of deals on this blog--often multiple deals everyday--I only actually go out and do small percentage of the deals I post here. Shocking, eh?
I've learned over time the freedom which comes from being able to say "no." And I've been bargain shopping long enough to know that most deals will come around again. If I miss a deal, I can always catch it next time.
Instead of feeling a sense of urgency to hit every deal possible, I pick and choose which deals are best suited for the time I have, the products we need, and which will work into my weekly shopping trip.
A peek into our kitchen, including my home management center(And just for the record, while I try to have it look like this at least once a day, it also often looks like this!)
Besides grocery shopping, we do very little other shopping. I hit the second-hand stores, some clearance sales, and a few community-wide garage sales or consignment sales a few times per year to buy clothes for myself and the girls. And we make an occasional stop every few months into a hardware store, fabric store, or office supply store. However, other than that, shopping trips are a rarity at our home. I make it my goal to learn to make do with what we have or to learn to live without as much as possible.
One of the nice side effects of shopping so rarely is that we don't have a lot of clutter. In fact, some would probably think our home looks really bare, but I'd much rather have only things we need, use, and love taking up residence in our home, than to have our rooms bulging with stuff we don't need, haven't used in a long time, and don't like in the first place.
It's so simple but it really works: just stay home!
What about you? How have you simplified your life and eliminated unnecessary outside activities so that you could keep things simple? I'd love to hear!
50 comments:
Amen! I have just recently told a friend that I'm glad we joined the Y, not only for the obvious health benefits, but because I used to go shopping to get out of the house!! Now, I am saving lots of money by excercising and I already have my anaity outing fulfilled!
I do agree that staying home is also a money saver, but when I had 3 kids under 5 and I was new to the area, I needed to make some friends and get out. I had no where to go except parks and shopping. he..he...Problem now solved. Although we do pay for a Y membership I feel we are saving at least that much in shopping less.
My husband found your site & thought I'd like to check it out. It's very encouraging to me. Like you, I do my grocery shopping one day a week although I do need to work on a more detailed menu & list. I might also do other errands on this day (like the library or the bank). It can be a busy morning, but we're always home by lunch & we're through, we don't go back out that afternoon. Having said that we don't stay home that much. I babysit a friend's children 2 days a week & we go to their house. Most other days the only thing we do is go to the YMCA to exercise & play, we some times go to a playground that's just a couple of miles from our home, & we're part of a (free) playgroup that meets once a week. We spend a lot in gas, but most of our activities are free. Every now & then we do an activity that costs a few dollars, but only if it's in the budget.
Our budget is so tight that we just can't spend unnecessarily & we refuse to go into debt. I just stay away from the stores, yard sales, etc. Everything I do buy is on sale, even the stuff I want. I love to scrapbook, but I try not to buy something unless I know I'm going to use it and it's on sale and/or I have a coupon, or I'm at a dollar store. Most of my son's clothes are hand me downs or from consignment stores.
I'm sorry this post is so lengthy. I look forward to reading more of your inspiring posts.
As a homeschooler of five, I say Amen to the idea of staying home. We are often criticized for not enrolling our girls in soccer, ballet, gymnastics, music lessons, etc, etc, etc. We have always seen our choice to homeschool as more a lifestyle of being home rather than a choice to have school at home. (BTW I teach piano and our girls sing at church). I am amazed at how many hours and miles friends travel each week just for sports and/or music (even homeschoolers)!!
We are not only saving time and money, but we are also cultivating relationships with our girls and between them.
Amen, Amen, & Amen...I get SOOO much more done when I stay home; and, I feel so much better for it. Really, there is nothing more fulfilling than being home with my son & knowing that I am being a good wife & mom. Chasing deals is part of what I do...but, if that is all that I am doing, it's not benefiting my family or home.
I do plan trips to the park or mall with my friends who have children - so we can all get together - but they are not super often. I also watch a friend's daughter twice a week, and that really helps me stay home & I earn a little extra cash doing it!
Your tips are such a blessing - it's nice to find super great deals on things, but also GREAT that you balance it with being frugal with your time & putting family first!
THANKS!
Crystal I am wondering what you tend to do for presents? Do you not give many presents? Do you make them yourself? Do you buy online?
With 5 children I find there are a number of birthday parties my children are invited to attend and presents need to be bought or made. Also quite a few of my friends are having babies so there are baby presents needed also.
I tend to buy presents most of the time because I just do not have the time to make things.
So I end up at the mall shopping for presents a lot. We set a limit on the amount we spend and we always make homemade cards and use homemade wrapping paper (the kids art work).
Anyway, just wondering what you do.
Do you do any playdates for your older daughter? Just curious. My children have always THRIVED on spending time with other children and are truly more content when they do so. It sounds like your older daughter is plenty content just being home, with you, though. :)
Something that really really helps me is that if I take the time to make a list, my husband will actually do the shopping and he will use coupons! It is such a blessing because then I'm not tempted to buy things I don't need (he's a little more disciplined than I am). I have to say thank you again for this timely post.
Last week I planned all week to go to CVS to get more Softsoap and do the Herbal Essence deal, but I simply did not have the time (even during my lunch breaks). And you know what? I feel kind of liberated! On Sunday, I thought, "Wow, I never did make it in there for that deal, but I feel good about it!" And why do I feel good about it? Because I know that before I ever actually NEED more, God will provide! He is so good to His children, and that is what gives us the FREEDOM to live simply!
Great post, Crystal.
Thanks for the reminder.
:>)
I remember staying home!
By the way, I posted about your awesomeness on my blog today!
:>) LOL
** H **
Hi Crystal,
My husband and I are big stay at home types too. While it might be tempting to participate in many of the wonderful activities we have an opportunity to partake of, we cannot sacrific our sanity and well being to be running to and fro.
One area people try to put a lot of pressure on us is church attendance. We really enjoy attending church and do so every Sunday but it simply does not work with our work schedules to attend every event that our church has. Seriously, we could be there every single day for at least a couple of hours. Some members do that, but it fits into that season of their lives.
Sorry I'm getting so wordy -- guess I'll have to do a post on this!
Take Care,
Trixie
Take Care,
Trixie
I have heard you mention several times that you shop second hand and garage sales for clothes for you and your girls. Do you have any tips on where you find good deals on your husband's clothes? My husband works in an office where he has to dress nice. Finding clothes for him at reasonably prices can be hard. Not to mention he is 6 foot 5 inches which makes it even harder. I know it is important for him to wear nice clothes because of the profession he is in. I usually end up shopping some of the nicer places and just watch sales and clearances. I was just curious how you manage this area since you do not set aside much for clothing in your budget.
Once again, another great reminder. I think I need to cut my # of stores on my shopping trip down. From 7 or 8 to what?!
Amen to this post! I couldn't agree more, and yet staying home is a decision I have to consciously make. If I don't, I find myself spending half a day running around town, buying stuff I don't need, and getting stressed out because I should be home getting things done. I was just saying to my husband this past weekend that April has been such a crazy month and I feel like I've gotten nothing accomplished. For May I am setting a goal to stay home as much as possible, and when I do go out, I'm going to be very diligent and follow my list of what stores I'm going to. Staying home really does make a major difference in my life and in my sanity. Thanks for such an encouraging post!
I have two daughters in college whom I homeschooled. We always stayed home alot to get our school work done. They were in Awanas and piano. We played with neighbor kids and worked in our garden. Fast forward to 2008 and the girls still like to stay home. My 22 yr. old spent Sat. cleaning and working around the house. She commented on how her college friends spent the weekend watching TV and partying. Her friends never want to stay home and get things done. I wonder where this playing mentality is learned. We do learn to be content at home.
Staying home really IS better. I've been trying to have more stay at home days lately.
One thing I've done to cut back a lot in our budget is to only do free activities for playdates. I belong to a MOMS Club and going to lots of play places always leads to lunch and sometimes even a shopping trip. Now I only sign up for free playdates at other mom's homes or at the library/mall's free childrens events.
:)
Thanks for a wonderful post! I've found it to be so true for myself. A few months back I had some scary cramping around 15 weeks pregnant, and it caused me to quit so many church-related activities. It has been a blessing in disguise! Being home more, for the first time ever I'm meal planning, budgeting, carefully planning shopping trips with coupons, etc. Plus, I'm having fun, and am so much less stressed. The baby is fine now.
The funny thing is that one of the activities I quit was being a paid childcare worker several hours per week. Now that I'm home more though--we're actually way better off financially than we've ever been. Staying home and being frugal is a much better paying job!!
I have a 1 and 3 year old. We usually do one outside activity per day from about 10-11:30am. Tuesdays we grocery shop, Thursdays is storytime at the library, and Wednesdays my mom stays with the kids for 2 hours so I can hit Walgreens, the bread wholesale, and the discount grocery. Monday and Friday we often run misc errands (bank, post office, etc), go to the park, or play with friends or cousins. It works out well for us since it breaks up the day a bit (chores get done before we leave and we are nearly always back by lunchtime), but I can foresee doing fewer outings when the kids get to "real" homeschool age.
Oh, Crystal, you hit it right on! I cut out all my "activities" except church choir this past winter because of burnout. I am no longer stressed, and I also have much more time at home to prepare more homemade foods for my family and to plan my menus and grocery shopping carefully. Then, I only shop once a week at one discount grocery store. All this staying home also keeps me from spending more - on convenience foods, fast foods, and bargains I "just gotta have"! Less stress and saving money, too - what a great deal!
Well said! We stay home a lot too. My husband figured out the "cost" of a trip to the nearest city (at the IRS' going rate of $0.50/mile) and it costs almost $20 each trip! Add that to the cost of whatever it is I think I need to buy and the money really adds up, especially since we're a one income family. I bundle all errands into one trip so I'm not out and about each day (Library is right after preschool drop off, groceries are after speech therapy, for example). Fortunately, we, as a family, create our own fun and we love to just hang out with the kiddos at home (of course, we tend to DRAW others because of this so we usually have at least one other family over from the neighborhood... I'm the KoolAid Mom but better at my house than my kids off somewhere else).
AMEN!! We have a term around here...Christian Fatigue Syndrome. Trying to do good to everyone wipes me out! Doing less is better for my family and learning to say "no" is liberating.
Preach it sister... I hear ya! I feel the same way..it helps to live 30 min out of the city and the price of gas at 3.59!
Titus 2 says we are to be keepers of our homes. God bless...
I was so glad to read your post! I have one-year old twins and I do belong to a Moms' Group, but I limit the outside activities, especially the ones that cost money! And the other Moms don't always understand it ... with 18 month olds, park are out for awhile and it's not worth it to me to spend $$$$ on things they will not yet appreciate!!!
As always, you are an inspiration!
I simplify with seasonal purging of stuff. My husband and I aren't real accumulators, but our family members are constantly giving us stuff! Stuff we don't need and it truly bugs us both. We always accept with grace, but I usually donate, sell stuff, or (gulp) regift! I try to organize areas of our closets for those three categories and then once a season, take the stuff out!
I'll bet that your mother was an amazing woman! :)
Staying home has its perks, but there are many ways to go out with the kids without spending money. Parks, library, playdates at other families' homes, potlucks, etc. We don't shop in this family, maybe once a month for clothes, presents, etc. I run a parents meet up group and try to pick activities that are free and incorporate an activity. Plus family memberships to the zoo, botanical gardens, etc. can provide an outlet without much cost. We ask for memberships for presents. It works out great.
I have a newborn - so it's much easier to stay home right now. I'm like you - I hit 1 grocery store a week and then do a CVS run, sometimes Walgreens. But that's it. Of course, I do fit in some other shopping once in a while, like Target or Costco - this week Kohl's. But I do save money by staying home - another thing is that if you wait long enough to buy something, then you realize you don't need it to begin with! That's how I am. And with the cost of gas and combining trips, sometimes that trip gets so big and overwhelming with 3 kids that everything gets scratched!
I stay home all day also, and only do my shopping once a week on Saturday morning. It's not only a money saver, it's a sanity saver. With 5 kids it does wear you out dragging them everywhere with you. I think it's also the reason I keep my food bill so low. If I don't have it, I make due with what I have or substitute for something else.
I once met this one lady who went to the store everyday after work to pick up whatever she was fixing for dinner that night. I can't imagine what her food bill was is like.
Thanks for writing this. I have made a big effort to stay home more often this year and I can already tell a difference. This post motivates me to cut out even more errands and activities.
Also, I LOVE redwork. LOVE IT!
I so totally recognize your kitchen! The layout sure looks an aweful lot like mine - did you purchase a Gehan Home? Just made me chuckle - I even had to show my husband. I love your blog! Thanks for sharing and all your hard work!
We stay home a lot, too. I have 3 children (ages 6, 4, and 2) and it's just too exhausting and too expensive to run all over town. We plan to stay home as much as possible this summer, too, when we add a 4th child to the mix (hopefully later this week). Summers with a newborn are much better at home -- I've had 3 summer babies so I know this from experience. We homeschool and I've had my 4 year old in speech therapy twice a week. That and homeschool PE is about as much outside activity as I can handle right now. Plus I've found that the kids are calmer when we spend more time at home. Just another added benefit!
We too stay home more during the day and we actually go grocery shopping every 2 weeks ( as my husband gets paid every 2 weeks). This turns out to be a BIG saver for us as we generally have lunch out somewhere when we go grocery shopping. We do homeschool so we could go anytime...but it is very important that we get our school work finished by the time we leave (or at least the 3 r's). My kids just do better in the morning than in the afternoon so, as has been said before...my time is worth something too. I would rather take my kids out later, get go out to lunch (with coupons or dollar menu of course) and have all school work done with little to no issues than to have to leave early and come home to have school at a not so prime time where there are bound to be issues and just a bad day for all.
We also consider ourselves a homeschool family (way of life) as compared to people who "school at home." but our kids do participate in outside sports and we are generally gone about 3 nights out of the week for maybe 3 months out of the year. While yes, I could keep my kids home and play games with them outside, I have a son who is DESPERATE for competitive team play. We notice huge changes in his behavior and attitude when he is involved in something and when he is not. He tends to get into more trouble when he is not actively involved in an outside sport...I know...most people would think it is the opposite. For us, life just seems to run smoother this way.
We also have therapy for my oldest daughter twice a week (during the school day) for autism spectrum issues. I could stop therapy to stay home...but before we started therapy our day was just NOT good to say the least. We have had a happier school day and to me..the expense of my time and gas has so been worth it and hope it does not stop any time soon.
All of that said....we make an extra effort to make sure we eat at home. All of our meals are planned out 2 weeks at a time, based on sales and what I purchase at our organic co-op. We eat all of our breakfasts at home and all but the 1 lunch every 2 weeks at home. Even when we go to visit friends for lunch, we bring ours. Even though our kids are in sports in the evening, you don't go without a schedule:) We schedule our dinners around when we know we will be home that night (or before we leave). Every once in a while if we ever go out for dinner it is a special occasion (the next time will be next week for a baby shower) and...as always...with coupons or a meal is split...water to drink. Altogether our family of 5 might go out to eat (even with our busy schedule) 3 times a month (that includes the 2 lunches...which we are working through our book it awards so we go out to pizza hut for about $10). I know for us funds are limited.........but its a matter of where you are willing to put your money and what works for your family. I know many families that keeping their kids out of team sports/activities is a great decision...but it would be/is a horrible fit for our family. To me that is worth it :) We just have to make sure we plan ahead!
Angela
Crystal
I'm totally interested in the Redwork -- how pretty. How did you get started?? Did someone teach you or did you read something that helped answer some basic questions. I remember doing some of this when I was very young but I remember next to nothing about it. I don't even know how to follow the pattern so it won't be a mess at the end. :) Let me know if you have any tips!
I couldn't agree more. My oldest sister used to "run the streets" as my parents would say. She did this with 3 young children in tow. She was either at our house, her friends' homes or shopping the sales at various stores - drug, grocery, discount, you name it. The woman was never home.
2 years ago her youngest daughter came to live with us. She could not believe that I made dinner every night. She was equally shocked that I made a salad, every single night and that our kids loved whole wheat bread. And that they (almost always) cheerfully ate their veggies that I put in front of them every night.
She said her mama never did that. It was a real treat when she made dinner. It made me sad for her. Overall, I think my sister raised her children well. But there are definitely some gaps there. I think the gaps could have been filled by having more at home time.
It was a lesson to me, and I'm with you. I'm staying home. We do everything that you mentioned. With exception to the red work. I haven't picked that up...yet.
Wonderful reminders!
I have a question...where do you find your redwork patterns? I have a cousin who does it (and bluework) and I have been looking for patterns for ages! My grandma used to have tons of iron-on patterns. Walmart once caried some very vintage-looking ones but, as you know, WM is phasing most of the fabric/craft stuff out. I have a very special table runner embroidered by my late grandmother and I would love to do some things in just red or blue also.
TIA for any help/advice! Love your blog!
I really agree with you that if you spend more time at home, you spend less money and bring less things into your home. If I am at home, I am not seeing things that I want to spend my money on, I become less materialistic and I am also not wanting the latest styles as they come and go!
After I had my 4th child, I stepped down from the dance ministry that I helped run at our church. After my 5th I stepped down from helping in the nursery for a little while. I felt a tremendous amount of guilt, but I had to put my family first.
Now that they are a little older, I help in the children's ministry once a month. I look forward to it too!
To stay home more, I combine as many errands into one trip. It saves on gas and the amount of times our day is disrupted.For family outings we take trips to playgrounds, parks, beaches, or go hiking. Sometimes we stay home and have friends or family over, have bonfires and roast marshmallows in the backyard, and in the winter we sled and make forts! Not only is it free but it's better for them to be in the sunshine and fresh air!
When my husband looked over my shoulder and saw "just stay home" he told me,"Amen, this is a blog you should keep reading!" hee,hee. He likes to tease me, but we do try not to do tons of running around in the week. But I have not mastered the art of groceries once a week. I know it is lack of planning on my part. I'm working on it. :)
Thanks for this reminder that the more I am out, the more I will spend.
Hey Crystal,
I'd love to know where you got your redwork project!
Crystal could I ask you what day of the week you tend to go do your weekly shopping trip to your local stores. Just was curious as I seem to think that if I go to late in the week they run out of sale items.
Thanks!
Renee
No more kids sports leagues! Ugh! What a time waster. They are much happier playing at home! No more Bible Studies--not that I NEVER study the Bible, I just do it with my Sunday School class and on my own. No more running to the latest celebrity-led video series at Church one night each week. No more video store movies. No more shopping just to "look" [i.e. to buy stuff we didn't know we WANTED let alone NEEDED]. Planning menus. Playing games as a family. Growing our garden together. Reading aloud. Yes a 13 year old can and will enjoy these things when presented with them in the right way!
I always thought you personally bought all the deals you mentioned and I wondered how you did it! I'm glad to hear you don't shop like crazy! I was beginning to feel like I couldn't keep up LOL! I too have to step back and limit my shopping. One grocery trip a week and one CVS trip a week (unless I stop on my lunch break from work). Since I have to work full time to support my family, I am not able to be home a lot. We also go to the Y on Saturday morning. My daughter really likes to get out of the house or she gets bored and drives me nuts! I take her to swimming lessons- they Y is very inexpensive and she loves it. And I go with her so it's still mommy time.
We try to stay home a lot, too. I miss a LOT of sales and deals I see posted on here because they don't line up with our shopping day. I go shopping for groceries once a week, church once a week, teach violin at a local school once a weeek (which is my 11mo old daughter's weekly trip to the park with her daddy), library is once every two weeks, and I go to La Leche League once a month. I try to make that it, but my parents live 8 miles away and like us to visit them frequently (though I try to get them to come over here!). I thought I'd get cabin fever staying home so much with a baby, but once we got into a routine I found I didn't need the distractions outside the home. I still don't know how you get so much done, though, with babies around, especially when Kathrynne was a baby. We stay home a lot and my daughter is good at playing by herself for a little bit at a time, but I can never sit on the couch and knit or do needlework without her crawling over to see what's going on, and trying to do it too! :)
I wanted to say thank you to whoever told you about the Kashi $2 off coupons and the $2 cereal sale at Walmart, and thank you for spreading the word. That is the only store-bought cereal we eat but it is SO expensive I rarely buy it. It's a special treat for my husband to have it, and we have two boxes of it now. Thank you to both of you! :)
I would love tips about how you save on your husband's clothes as well. My husband is an attorney (like yours), and we often don't find enough nice clothes in thrift shops that would be appropriate for appearing before a judge, or attend meetings with other lawyers, so I usually end up at the mall when there is a good sale on menswear. I don't mind buying his clothes retail instead of secondhand, but any advice on saving money this way would be appreciated!
Love your redwork, by the way!
Add to the fact the gas prices are getting outrageous---you are probably saving more than ever by staying home!
They were posing a quesiton the other day on Fox--"Is $10 a gallon gas in our future?"
How scary is that!
We have made tons of changes lately to make our lives simpler. We only run errands on two days of the week and we try to make sure they are the same days that we have to be out of the house anyway. I have also started sorting through our closets, toy bins, etc every month and seem to always find at least a bag of stuff to give away. And now that the weather is nicer we will start to walk everywhere, which cuts down on consumption....We can only carry so much. :) Thanks for this great series with all the helpful info and tips.
Erin
Thank you for your timely post, Crystal. I think it brought balance to some of the other blogs about saving money...where it seems there can be a temptation to run frantically around finding deals. This is a good reminder to slow down, realize I don't need every deal out there, and use the extra time to enjoy my home, husband, and daughter.
Wow! You got that right! Staying home surely saves time and money. Thanks for the reminder!
I agree on that. I did it the 1st time the gas $ went up and I am doing it again. to the point of finding a new doc that is closer to me!
If I do need something I just ring up my hubby and he pickes it up on the way home! Saves me time and gas.
I haven't darken the doors of a Target or a Walmart in months by doing this.
Glad to hear that I am not the only one that thinks this way.
Way to go Girl!
We've cut out the going out but are still inundated with clutter. I *wish* my kitchen looked like yours. *sigh*
For starters, being new to the frugal thing, I have articles, print outs, books, etc. with ideas scattered all over to help me realize good frugal ideas and think up others on my own.
I *SO* want to get to where you are but the day-to-day acts of frugalness - particularly making things from scratch which (at this point) is taking me longer - leave little time for purging the unnecessary.
Hmmm... I'm going to have to disagree with you on this one. I'm home about 85% of the time, and I still don't have any time. I know the reason, though. It's because I do too many things for other people. For example, I just made a quilt for my niece (who's two months old). And I am embroidering a pair of converse for my brother. And I have to make 4 presents for May, which I haven't started on yet. I could go on...
I suppose those could be counted as outside activities, in a sense. I just wish I had more time for writing.
Thanks for the encouragement! Here is a picture of what we've been doing while staying home.
http://thesavingsswap.blogspot.com/
I do have to run our today to vote and go to the library - but because of your encouragement it will be a short trip, not an all day thing - with no shopping stops! =)
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